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Thursday, 14 January 2016

Book Spotlight: FREE The Hannelack Fanny: Or How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love My Rump by Lori Schafer



A young woman's life is changed forever when she discovers what everyone around her has known all along: that a renowned family characteristic has re-emerged in a most unfortunate location - her own backside. Follow her journey from embarrassment to acceptance to unbridled joy as she learns to appreciate the wonders of going through life with the Hannelack fanny. And don't forget to look for my commentary on the real-life inspiration behind this glorious tale of a glorious behind - me!

Excerpt

One weekend a few months after my glorious ass-awakening, John and I went on a road trip. I’d leaned over sideways and lifted my skirt up over my hips so that he could rest his hand on my ass while he was driving. Sunshine was streaming through the open sunroof and my butt felt warm in spite of its near-nakedness. How I relished that sensation now!
Suddenly a truck horn sounded.
“Hey!” I heard a man yell. “Hey, wide load!”
A year before, I would have been mortified. Not anymore.
I turned to look. A semi was travelling beside us. The man in the passenger seat was staring at my bared ass. The driver was leaning over, trying to get a look.
“Like what you see, boys?” I yelled back, jerking my body in my seat to set my rump to rippling.
“WOOOO-EEEE! Shake that ass, mama!”
In that moment, something possessed me. It was as if the beast that had so long been bolted to my bottom had finally broken free of its cage. It wanted out. All the way out.
I unhooked my seatbelt and jumped up on my seat. With effort I wriggled my way through the open sunroof, ass and all. And then I wiggled out of my panties, lifted up my skirt, and showed myself to the world. Every last wobbling inch of me.
“Look at my ass!” I yelled, slapping it hard with my palm. “Look at my ass!”
I was bouncing, jumping up and down in place, and my ass, behemoth that it was, was bouncing, too, the fat landing on the warm roof of the car and then retreating back up to my waist in happy rhythm while I pointed and laughed.
“Look at my ass!”
***
A young woman's life is changed forever when she discovers what everyone around her has known all along: that a renowned family characteristic has re-emerged in a most unfortunate location - her own backside. Follow her journey from embarrassment to acceptance to unbridled joy as she learns to appreciate the wonders of going through life with the Hannelack fanny.
Short story, 6,000 words.

NOTE ON CONTENT: The Hannelack Fanny, while in large part a humorous piece, contains explicit sexual scenarios and is therefore inappropriate for readers under the age of eighteen.

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